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Coping and support

By Mayo Clinic staff

Coping with infertility can be difficult. It's an issue of the unknown — you can't predict how long it will last or what the outcome will be. Infertility isn't necessarily solved with hard work. The emotional burden on a couple is considerable, and plans for coping can help.

Planning for emotional turmoil

  • Set limits. Decide in advance how many and what kind of procedures are emotionally and financially acceptable for you and your partner and attempt to determine a final limit. Fertility treatments may be expensive and often not covered by insurance companies, and a successful pregnancy often depends on repeated attempts. Some couples become so focused on treatment that they continue with fertility procedures until they are emotionally and financially drained.
  • Consider other options. Determine alternatives — adoption, donor sperm or egg, surrogacy, or even having no children — as early as possible in the fertility process. This may reduce anxiety during treatments and feelings of hopelessness if conception doesn't occur.
  • Talk about your feelings. Locate support groups or counseling services for help before and after treatment to help endure the process and ease the grief should treatment fail.

Managing emotional stress during treatment

  • Acupuncture. This ancient therapy has been shown to reduce anxiety and increase optimism during IVF. While this may not have any effect on your chances of becoming pregnant, it can make the process more enjoyable.
  • Practice relaxation. Cognitive behavioral therapy, which uses methods that include relaxation training and stress management, has been associated with higher pregnancy rates.
  • Express yourself. Reach out to others rather than repressing guilt or anger.
  • Stay in touch with loved ones. Talking to your partner, family and friends can be very beneficial. The best support often comes from loved ones and those closest to you.

Managing emotional effects of the outcome
Whatever the result of your fertility treatment, you'll face the possibility of psychological challenges. Seek professional help if the emotional impact of any of these outcomes becomes too heavy for you or your partner:

  • Failure. The emotional stress of failure can be devastating even on the most loving and affectionate relationships and for people who've prepared well for the possibility of failure. Common emotional responses include anger, guilt, shock, self-esteem problems, sexual problems and marital problems.
  • Success. Even if fertility treatment is successful, it's common to experience stress and fear of failure during pregnancy. If you have a history of depression or anxiety disorder, you're at increased risk of these problems recurring in the months after your child's birth.
  • Multiple births. A successful pregnancy that results in multiple births introduces new medical complexities and the likelihood of significant emotional stress both during pregnancy and after delivery.
References
  1. Guzick DS. Evaluation of the infertile couple. http://www.uptodate.com/home/index.html. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  2. Hornstein MD et al. Optimizing natural fertility in couples planning pregnancy. http://www.uptodate.com/home/index.html. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  3. Infertility: Frequently asked questions. National Women's Health Information Center. http://www.womenshealth.gov/FAQ/infertility.cfm. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  4. Swerdloff RS, et al. Causes of male infertility. http://www.uptodate.com/home/index.html. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  5. Kuohung W, et al. Etiology of female infertility. http://www.uptodate.com/home/index.html. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  6. Brassard M, et al. Basic infertility including polycystic ovary syndrome. Medical Clinics of North America. 2008;92:1163.
  7. Lobo RA. Infertility: Etiology, diagnostic evaluation, management, prognosis. In: Katz VL, et al., eds. Comprehensive Gynecology. 5th ed. Philadelphia, Pa.: Mosby; 2007. http://www.mdconsult.com/das/book/body/134799312-6/0/1524/267.html?tocnode=53760021&fromURL=267.html#4-u1.0-B978-0-323-02951-3..50044-3_1301. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  8. Kuohung W, et al. Overview of treatment of female infertility. http://www.uptodate.com/home/index.html. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  9. Thinking about fertility treatment. March of dimes. http://www.marchofdimes.com/pnhec/173_14308.asp. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  10. Understanding menopause. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. http://www.womenshealth.gov/menopause/stages/premature.cfm. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  11. Uterine fibroids: Frequently asked questions. U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. http://www.womenshealth.gov/FAQ/uterine-fibroids.cfm. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  12. Weng X, et al. Maternal caffeine consumption during pregnancy and the risk of miscarriage: A prospective cohort study. American Journal of Obstetrics and Gynecology.2008;198:5.
  13. Sigman M, et al. Male infertility. In: Wein AJ, et al, eds. Campbell-Walsh Urology. 9th ed. Philadelphia, Pa: Saunders Elsevier; 2007. http://www.mdconsult.com/das/book/body/134799312-10/836106647/1445/22.html#4-u1.0-B978-0-7216-0798-6..50021-2_1518. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  14. Casper RF, et al. Ovulation induction with aromatase inhibitors. http://www.uptodate.com/home/index.html. Accessed April 30, 2009.
  15. Hammer LB. Psychiatric aspects of infertility and infertility treatments. Psychiatric Clinics of North America. 2007;30:689.
  16. Domar AD. The impact of acupuncture on in vitro fertilization outcome. Psychiatric Clinics of North America. 2007;30:4.

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June 27, 2009

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